More often than not, whenever I sit down to write, the endeavor becomes an unfolding dialogue between myself and my Higher Mind and/or Spirit guides. This has been going on for many years now, before I really had any understanding of what was happening. I would write a question, and allow an answer to come through for that question, which I would hurriedly write down, as if taking dictation. After a while, different, clear “voices” emerged.
At this point, much further down this road, I have embraced the format of this dialogue, and the internal wisdom that comes through in the experience. I do not personally claim to be the source of this wisdom in the egoic sense, but rather I am the steward of it. I am a specific window through which it may flow. One of many.
I have found, through asking questions that are personally relevant to me, through private channeling sessions, and through the channeling that produced my book, that the messages that come through would frequently be of value to others.
Previously, the format of this blog has been my take on things — my analysis of what has come through, and the experiences I’ve had in this journey of inner work. With today’s post, I’d like to expand the blog to include not only my reflections of these exchanges, but also the direct dialogues themselves, unabridged, in those cases where I feel it would be of service to others. Below is the first of those dialogues shared here, which occurred a couple of days ago.
So I have found, for quite some time now, and especially since the days of planning my wedding, that I spend an inordinate amount of time in front of one screen or another, consuming information.
To be fair, quite a bit of it is informative, and I am learning quite a bit. But I’ve also found that day after day, I “lose” whole days to this practice, and ultimately, do not feel any closer to accomplishing what I’d like to accomplish in this lifetime. I am, in effect, living to consume. In my case, I am consuming food and information, mainly.
∞ And this concerns you?
It does. Yes. It concerns me in the sense that my time here in this life is limited, and this practice of daily consumption of information and/or entertainment does not feel satisfying — gratifying is a better word for it.
∞ Perhaps it’s not designed for that.
Can you assist me in helping me understand why I choose this? What is the belief deep down that projects the illusion of this practice being so enticing? Why do I keep doing that?
∞ There are lots of factors here at work. It’s important to note that the information that you find online is, at present, your primary link to those of like mind. You do not presently have that in your physical environment, save for Vola. And that is OK.
The issue, and the challenge as we see it, is that the structures wherein you find this information are designed as mind traps. The info you seek can very often be the “cheese” in the mouse trap, so to speak. You go in for the cheese, become ensnared, and remain trapped there the better part of a day.
On top of that, you’ve built habits around this pattern. You have become accustomed to going after that cheese and getting trapped. You are patterned to repeat this. But patterns can be broken, and so can this one.
OK. I can feel some of the greater answer coming through here, but I will proceed one step at a time: How do I break the “mouse trap pattern”, while still allowing myself access to those people and that information I wish to connect with?
∞ There are ways, and we will share them, but this is not the heart of the matter.
And what is?
∞ The heart of the matter is your unwillingness to dive in to your mission/purpose/reason for coming into this life.
OK, I can feel that. I understand that I can certainly commit more fully to meditation and the tasks…
∞ No. This perspective is why you fail. These things are tasks to you, like getting your oil changed or doing the dishes. If they are “tasks,“ and you wish to feel that you are the master of your own life, which of course you are, then you are putting these things into a mental compartment of undesirable activities.
Yes, of course, there are strategies out there for how to do more of the things that you’d really rather not do, but is that really what you want here? Do you really want to learn willpower techniques to push past the tasks that you feel resistant to doing?
Or wouldn’t it be more useful to examine why there is resistance to these things and perform resistance-alleviating activities instead?
So we are back to meditation, but in a different context.
∞ Yes. And of course, we are not speaking of meditation singly and specifically, but is a useful focal point in this discussion nonetheless.
And so, what if the information and connections that you seek could all be derived through your inner Internet? What if you chose to swap the mental labels of the meditation being a task and collecting information from the Internet that something you can easily find yourself doing for hours? What if you swapped these things?
It does sound intriguing.
∞ And it comes with the added benefit of no mouse trap: no external structures that are designed to keep you there.
OK, so help me here — I have set up many habits that revolve around perusing the Internet.
∞ Yes we know.
Are these helpful or not?
∞ Helpful in what way? They are helpful in broadening your understanding of a topic, and connecting with others about that topic, but did you choose that topic?
Did you start the session with the idea that you would study this thing, and then find what you were looking for? Did you bond with anyone in the comments? Did you strengthen any connections? Did you come away from the experience feeling empowered? Informed, yes. More aware, yes. But we mean personally empowered, as in ready to launch into activity that you chose and you feel inspired to do?
While that does happen, it’s rare. I am essentially chasing that feeling through this activity.
∞ So is chasing a feeling helpful to you?
No, it’s not. It means, by definition, that what I seek is running away from me.
∞ Yes. And there is the other side of this. When you are “well-informed” on a topic, what do you then do? How do you use that information? Or do you? At all?
There is another little trap that we know you are aware of, that warrants bringing up in this discussion: you are consuming information, not using it. Consuming, consuming, consuming. You are building great libraries of information in your mind, but that information sits, unused, not put into practice more often than not. Would you describe that as helpful?
No I would not. I am collecting information — in a sense, I am amassing it for some future version of myself to read later. I have books on my shelf that are unread. I have a “watch later” list of videos on my YouTube account that is hundreds of videos long.
And those things that I have read, that I have consumed already, only a small percentage have I activated in my life, or at least am I activating now.
∞ And do you find that helpful?
No I do not.
∞ To be fair, you are immersing yourself in information, and that does bleed into your life more than you realize.
But in many ways I feel that I can’t act on this or that, or express these things to those around me.
∞ But you can act. You can express. There are myriad ways to do that. You simply have to make the decision to do it, and then follow that where it leads you.
The bookcase — whether it is in your mind, or actually physical, was not meant to simply gather dust. It is there to be used by you, in a manner that you see fit. Actualize it. Express it. Share it. And live it. This is why it is there. Let what you already have be enough. You have more books than you know what to do with. They are, as of now, clutter. This was not why you paid for them.
Find ways of removing yourself, entirely, from the cybernetic appendages you have come to rely on too heavily — if only because of the answers given here. Challenge yourself to use what you have — and that includes the insights and downloads from meditation — to re-calibrate your life as you see fit.